Massage Parlor Hilarities

Here's me after a trying day and a funny massage experience!

There was reason to smile after all!

Okay, so yesterday didn't start off all too grand, but God provided just the humor I needed to brighten my day. I woke up yesterday (Saturday) morning and realized it was time to change my insulin pump. I really haven't been enjoying those days, b/c it keeps messing up requiring me to change it out several times before I finally get a spot that works. Anyway, yesterday was no different. I injected the canula into the site, and not long after, I hear the annoying beep of my pump telling me that insulin delivery is not working. SO I CHANGE IT OUT AGAIN. It seems to be working, so I head to work. I practiced patience by riding the busses.

Well, at work I decide to get all my stuff done and then join my team teacher April for a massage at 4 pm. I was not feeling well and then at 3 pm, my stupid pump starts beeping again telling me that insulin delivery is not working. I was so frustrated at this time, b/c my blood sugar was so high and I felt super tired and ready to barf. I hadn't even gotten all my work done and now I was having to pack up, ride busses back home, change my pump out, then take a taxi to the massage parlor, and then go back to work.

Well, I made it home and took care of the pump problem. On my way out to catch a taxi, a lady stopped me and started witnessing to me. I was so annoyed, b/c she asked, "Are you going somewhere?" I told her that I was and then she said some opening line and asked, "Would you like to live forever if you could?" I explained to her that I was already planning to live eternally with Jesus Christ in heaven. We talked a little more and then the Jehovah's Witness pamphlets came out. God really knows how to keep us in line and remind us to treat others with love at all times even when we're not feeling too patient and loving. I must admit that I wanted to yell at that lady after she had made me miss 2 or 3 empty taxis and then she ended her wholesome, spiritual talk with pamphlets that perverted God's word! I was already short and not in the mood to deal with people. After I told her my beliefs and that I was not interested in taking her literature, she walked off and I was left to wait for what seemed like forever for another taxi. I barely made it to my appointment in time.

In the taxi, I began to pray for my attitude and that woman. I was now frustrated with my attitude and outlook on the day. The truth of the matter is that God was in the midst of what seemed like a not-so-good day. The weather was gorgeous. God had protected me physically and has provided me with a way to control my diabetes through insulin pump therapy. HE has blessed me with the promise of eternal life! HE's forgiven me and allows me to join HIM in His work, even when I fail HIM. Okay, now for the humor!

I have been wanting to get a massage since last August and have never followed through with making an appointment. Well, yesterday I got an hour long dry back massage! It was great and worth every penny! The first kind of funny thing was the fact that April got a woman (which I was told we'd both have) and I got this cute little Korean man. I lay down and of course I wasn't immediately relaxed. I kept thinking of Katie Jo and Heather and what they'd be doing in my situation. This man was pressing and working so hard that it hurt but felt good at the same time. I was smirking at the ground, glad that he could not see my face. I kept imagining Heather and Katie yelling or making noises as if to say, "Lay off, dude. That's a little too firm." The real smirking came when he began to massage my BUTT (yes, the entire thing), which I guess is considered to be the "lower back." I almost cracked up, but held it in just as if I were in the pews at church. The whole time I was thanking the LORD that that man couldn't see my immature smirk. Then, the dude jumps up on the table and is hovering over me. All I could think at this point was, "He better not sit on my butt and massage/crack my back like my sisters and I used to do to each other. This is also not horsey time with Michaela." I was a little nervous at this point, but decided to relax. Again, I was picturing Katie Jo and Heather.

All of that to get to this...He tells me to flip over on my back and massages my face and head with this cloth over the top half of my face. All he can see is my mouth. He then stands behind my head and raises my arms up over my head. He started massaging my armpits. I was think, "Good laws, I'm about to burst out laughing. Please Lord help me to contain myself. It's all mental, Audie. Stay strong." I was also thinking about the fact that he can now see me smirk. And then I realized how funny it would truly be if Hea and KaJo were there in the room with me. "So far, so good. Be strong, Audie. Oh no, he can see me smirk." At that point, I lost it and let out a gut-wrenching laugh. The poor man froze and then I hear, "You ok?" I was still kind of giggling and said, "Yes, I'm sorry. I'm ticklish!" Then, the man, April, and the other lady, crack up. I was mortified. I felt like a 6th grade girl! However, I had a lot more laughing to do and was glad that the massage was only about 2 minutes longer. We were all smirking upon exiting the room. I kept laughing everytime I thought about it. Even as I was walking back to work down the crowded street and in my classroom. God is so faithful and knew that I needed to release some stress through laughter! I was relaxed with my face and makeup crumpled, but glad to be a child of the king! You better believe I'm taking Katie Jo there when she visits this summer!